17 Comments

  1. Can I love this a million times! I have recently taught a class about “sacred sex” and how others should not be ashamed to talk about SEX in Church. Sex was created by God to be a holy act between married couples. Having a healthy sexual relationship is key in marriages. I loved how you wrote that it isn’t just for “men.’ I loved this post so much!!

    • melissa

      I’m so glad you enjoyed the post! I never realized how much I would be talking to married couples about sex as a Christian mental health therapist. It has become so skewed and tainted. Thank you for reading and commenting! God Bless!

    • Ashley

      This is a wonderful post and helped me tremendously!
      The only thing I do want to point out, and get some clarifying feedback on for myself, as well as anyone else who may be struggling:

      We read in your post that many times, we as Christians especially can be taught to think that sex is a “wifely duty”, made to feel like a chore almost. And you made clear that is not how God intended it!

      But then, we read in 1Corinthians 7:3-5 “The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise a wife to her husband.”

      Assuming that scripture is referring to sex in marriage; For someone struggling to understand, that somewhat sounds contradicting… I’m not supposed to see sexual intimacy in my marriage as a chore or duty; yet the scripture states that it is. And actually uses the word “duty.”

      Can you share your thought?

      Thank you.

  2. I went into marriage expecting sex to be great and it has been! However, over the last 15 years, our lives are often so busy that it doesn’t happen with nearly the frequency that I’d like. Yet you are right, it the very act that is created by God to help bring husband and wife together. Thanks for the reminder that we need to make it more of a priority.

    • melissa

      I’m glad the post touched you today! Sexual intimacy is definitely meant to be a time of joy and togetherness rather than “oh yeah…” Schedule it in! Thank you for reading and commenting! God Bless!

  3. So very true!! This is a topic that is so frequently side stepped and makes people feel awkward but when seen as a God-given gift can be spoken of with wisdom and encouragement. Thanks for your input!

    • melissa

      I think it has trickled down from a place of anxiety. We worry about our children making mistakes that could hinder their health and/or change their life. So then being told about sex in hushed tones by uncomfortable parents continues the pattern. Thank you for reading and commenting. God Bless!

  4. When my children get older, I love that I can tell them that their daddy is the only boy I’ve ever kissed and that our wedding night was as God intended it to be, the first one. I only hope that I can teach my children what a gift purity truly is.

    • melissa

      That truly is a gift that not many people can say! Thank you for reading and commenting! Many blessing to you and your family!

  5. I think if more believers shared how amazing this gift of sex is in a marriage, more teens would be steadfast in waiting, more marriages would be spared from divorce, and more children would grow up in loving homes! Thank you for speaking truth that is so needed in our culture today!

    • melissa

      I agree so much Maria! The understanding of sex has become so skewed and it has caused such harm in so many families! Thank you for reading and commenting. God Bless!

  6. Thank you for sharing this at Christian Marriage and Motherhood this week! It’s always a subject less written about, but so important and vital in married life. I’m glad to have stopped by your blog today!

    • melissa

      Sexual intimacy definitely gets less focus in terms of post topics but it is one of the most talked about subjects in my therapy office with clients. Thank you for reading and commenting! God Bless!

  7. Penny Serrao

    Thanks so much for this post I needed to read this because I always felt that even after marriage sex was still unholy even though I know is a gift from Gid it was always tough to really enjoy it with my husband I always struggle to make him happy but after I read this I feel much more better about it an I won’t shy away anymore is just not for Men but is for both husband and wife.Bless you woman of God.

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