Women of Class – Becoming a Titus 2 Woman
Our society has made a significant push to attempt to elevate women and the view of women. However, the process in which it has done so has been without class.
The game plan appears to be to do everything that men do but in the process tear down men. We are told to be strong, courageous, bold and assertive. (Not bad things I might add.) But somehow these characteristics are no longer okay for men to be. And these characteristics are being viewed as important to have instead of others as opposed to in addition.
As women, we are currently being told we can do anything we want. But if our choice is to be a Christian woman who loves our husband and our family then somehow we are holding women back. If we prefer femininity, gentleness and class over sexual and provocative we are not taking a stand.
How did this get so skewed?
We are in desperate need of reminding women why God created us in the manner He did. To remember the importance of our role. Not as less than but also not better. We are men’s counterpart.
I think we need to realign and stand firm in how God desires women to be. So that we then can teach younger women and our daughters how to be women of God with class.
*Note – I’m also not saying that men are without fault. But let’s remember, two wrongs don’t make a right. Titus 2 also addresses men and the behaviors they are supposed to exude. This post, however, is focusing on women.
Titus 2:3-5 (NIV)
3 Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. 4 Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, 5 to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.
Let’s break it down by verse.
Titus 2:3 Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good.
Teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live,
The definition of reverent is to show deep and solemn respect. To go further, the definition of respect is to admire (someone or something) deeply, as a result of their abilities, qualities, or achievements.
So to deeply admire God in the way He wants women to live.
This is not only an act of obedience to God but also viewed as a privilege to carry out the role that God has designed for us.
Not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine,
A slanderer is someone who makes false and damaging statements about someone. This can also include gossip. How often do we talk negatively about others? We are called to raise each other up not tear them down. (Usually in an attempt to build ourselves up.)
So why the part about addicted to much wine? First, it doesn’t say ‘don’t drink wine’. It emphasized addicted to much wine.
Addicted means to be physically and mentally dependent on a particular substance, and unable to stop taking it without incurring adverse effects.
We are not to allow anything or anyone to get in the way of our relationship with God. To seek Him first above all others. If a person is addicted to something. This becomes the thing they go to.
For the past few years there has been a fad for women to celebrate and glorify the drinking of wine. There are shirts, mugs, posters, and Youtube channels all emphasizing this phenomenon.
But to teach what is good.
Good is God! It is teaching others about God and ways to glorify Him!
Titus 2:4 Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children,
Then
Then, meaning, the older women need to fulfill the items in verse three, first, before they can help the younger women. We can’t teach others how to go if we ourselves are doing the very things we tell them not to do. Or don’t actually believe is important to do.
Urge the younger women
Urge means to try earnestly or persistently to persuade, recommend, and/or encourage (someone) to do something. This is not a passive action!
to love their husbands and children
How do you think about your husband and children? Is there resentment and bitterness in your heart towards them? Do you ever fantasize about what you would be able to do/achieve if you were single?
These are areas you need to pray over and repent of. We cannot have love and hate in our heart at the same time. And yes, resentment and bitterness is a form of hate.
Titus 2:5 to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.
to be self-controlled and pure
Self-control is the ability to control oneself, in particular one’s emotions and desires or the expression of them in one’s behavior, especially in difficult situations.
Pure is not mixed or adulterated with any other substance or material; free of contamination; wholesome and untainted by immorality, especially that of a sexual nature.
So we are not to be driven by our emotions and desires but rather remain rooted in godly principles and sound logic.
to be busy at home
Don’t read more into this statement than it says. It does not say women have to stay at home. It says be busy at home. I work full-time outside of the home. But that doesn’t give me the right to do nothing once I return.
be kind
Kind is having or showing a friendly, generous, and considerate nature. I’m actually saddened that I felt it necessary to add this definition. But kindness is not being taught or encouraged with the level of importance as it should be. Instead we are seeing it recommended to women to fight, push, and budge their way if life.
and to be subject to their husbands
This use of the word “subject” does mean under the authority of. Other translations use the word obedient and submissive.
I know this can cause many women to cringe. Especially in our society of encouraging independent women.
But let’s remember that the marriage relationship is supposed to emulate our relationship with Jesus. He loves and cares for us and wants what is best for us. We then, in turn, trust Him and want to abide.
This is supposed to be true for husbands and wives as well. He can’t point our fingers as husbands saying they are not holding up their part of the deal, if we also are not living out our role as well.
So…
So is a conjunction. It’s used to to help us understand why it’s important that we to do all of the aforementioned statements. You could also say “and for this reason”.
that no one will malign the word of God
NKJV says – that the word of God may not be blasphemed.
NASB says – so that the word of God will not be dishonored.
NLT says – Then they will not bring shame on the word of God.
As Christian women, we are representatives of God. What we do and how we live our lives should be honoring to God and encouraging others to seek God as well. That is our first and foremost role!
We are to check our behaviors and ask if how we are presenting ourselves is glorifying to God. And we are to teach other Christian women to desire to do the same.
God bless!
Melissa
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Wow! These words are so powerful! Our society should share more words like this than other nonsense like the Kardashians. I pray that God begins to position the right people so our society reflects more of this!
Thank you Kimberly! As a therapist I see too many females of all ages being pushed and pulled and crammed into boxes they were never meant to be in. It saddens be to see how far away from God’s design we have gotten. Thank you for reading and sharing your thoughts. God bless!
So right Kimberly this is what I have been praying for to be positive and an uplifter.
Also taking responsibility for my own words n actions. In the world of today people want to lay the blame on another’s shoulders for making them do what they did. In all reality no one can make you do the wrong thing. That is solely your decision to do what’s right or wrong.
Hi Melissa, I’m concerned about the Titus 2 movement which has swept the church in recent years. I feel it’s based on a somewhat flawed exegesis of the passage and the result is a flawed movement (with a life of it’s own!). My view is not PC in women’s Christian circles for sure, and male leadership won’t dare criticize for fear of being labeled mysogenist, etc. However, your article seems reasonable and makes many good points. In particular, demonstrating the very qualities we are supposed to be teaching (“training”) others. Demonstrate means to do… Ours is a female dominated culture, and invariably the runaway Titus 2 movement is all about us once again. Obsessed with our place, identity, voice, ministry, influence, reputation, importance, legacy, happiness, fulfillment… are we older women actually demonstrating contentment as we gather women to ourselves (away from serving husbands and children) and by example teach them to do the same. After all, it’s NOT about letting husbands lead their wives with honor, no but rather seeking out “spiritual” women to meet our spiritual needs. Am I the only one who thinks this way?
Melissa, this is a great post. I totally agree, that women in our society are going after equality in a wrong way. We are not men and men are not women. God made us different for a reason and He knew what strengths to give each of them and how working together makes a much more efficient relationship and a stronger, more stable society. Thank you for sharing this wisdom. – Amy
http://stylingrannymama.com/
Absolutely Amy! When we do things different that how God designed it doesn’t go well! That’s been true since the beginning of man! Thank you for stopping by and sharing your insights. God bless!
I just wrote an ariticle entitled: Why I’m Not a Feminist, and Why I’m Not, Not a Feminist. We will see if they publish it! Great reminder that equal doesn’t mean the same. Praise God for that!
It sounds like it would be a great article but definitely not popular with society today! Thank you for stopping by. God bless!
What a wonderful, close, and balanced look at what Titus 2 means for us today, and our daughters. This article is so worth bringing back over and over again! Hugs my precious sister.
Thank you Tammy! It is such an important topic and is getting so skewed in our society. Thank you for your encouragement! God bless!
What’s happening in our society is just more evidence of the curse on Eve coming to fruition. The feminist movement doesn’t celebrate what it means to be feminine, but seeks to take what is unique to men. Hooray for what you said here. Thanks!
What a great point Karen! Yes, the curse of Eve is being played out more and more in our culture. Thank you for stopping by and sharing your thoughts. God bless!
This is a great post, Melissa! I was just reading about the differences between men and women in the home according to God. Instead of making me feel put down, it empowered me to feel like my job is super important as a woman in my home!
Yes! As it should! We were created to be different and important in our own right. We are not to be compared to men because we were not created to be men! Thank you for stopping by and sharing your thoughts. God bless!
I was just reading this passage today. It struck me much the same way. Teaching to be reverent is key. Reverence is not being taught. The devil is trying to destroy how God has set things up and so he chooses to belittle and encourage us to belittle those who we should respect.
Yes! Reverence is definitely not being taught. Step into any gathering of children and teens and you can tell reverence is not being taught. The devil has a tight grip but thankfully we know Who wins! Thank you for stopping by and sharing your insights. God bless!
Melissa, What a great word. Yes, men and women are different and that is good. My teen son and I were just talking today about women and how some of the ways women show they are strong and empowered are not really showing them as strong and empowered (like posting scantily dressed pictures of themselves, being the aggressor in relationships). Sometimes we women also tap more into our masculine side to empower our self. We try to be harsh and hard like men, but this doesn’t bring us happiness. We need to be feminine, womanly, and compliment men. We need to be Christian women of class.
That’s so wonderful that you were having this conversation with your teenage son. Yes, we need to go back to embracing femininity. And helping others understand that that doesn’t mean weaker or less than. Just simply different! Thank you for stopping by and sharing your thoughts and experiences. God bless!
I’m grateful that both men and women can be strong and competent and called, without compromising themselves or each other. God is truly a good Father to bless us with such diversity in the body.
Yes, I’m grateful as well! We are important in our own right because both men and women are made in God’s image and at the same time distinctly different. Thank you for stopping by and sharing your thoughts. God bless!
What a great post, Melissa! I love how you broke down this passage and explained each phrase. You have done well addressing this topic. Thank you for linking up with Grace and Truth. I have chosen your post as my feature this week. Please stop by my site tomorrow (Friday) and get the “I Was Featured” button for your post!
Thank you Aimee! This is an area that I feel desperately needs attention given society’s view of women. Thank you for the feature! God bless!
Thank you so much Mellisa
My heart is melted with how you explain every bit of it
More grace dear
I have a question on submission. My husband wants me and the kids to go w ith him to Venezuela for missionary work. My kids are small. Also, in that country food and medicine are scarce. Also, crime is at a high rate. I feel that if my kids are to sacfrice and themselves for Christ, it should be when they’re older and able to make the decision. What do I do? Say?
This sounds like a difficult situation Ivette. I would say first, pray for God’s guidance. Ask for His discernment about the situation. Then I would suggest having an open conversation with your husband following God’s promptings. God bless you and your family!
This is awesome! Thank you for this. In a world where everyone is trying to “prove” their self, it is so easy to become unaligned with God. ♥️
Came across this post on accident , read and reread several times! Im also reading Becoming a Titus 2 Women by Martha Peace and this has touched my life deeply. I have 2 daughters still very young and I want to be the example they need to become women of God. Thank you for emphasizing this passage. May God Bless You!