24 Comments

  1. These are incredible tips for getting kids to open up! Thank you for sharing your knowledge and experience in practical ways! As a momma of six, two of whom are adopted, these strategies are so important for creating a safe atmosphere where our kiddos can disengage any fear responses and just talk!

    • Melissa

      I’m glad you found the post beneficial. I pray it allows your children to feel safe and comfortable with you! Thank you for stopping by and sharing your thoughts. God bless!

  2. I love the asking questions part. I’ve found that if you ask more questions – along with the undivided attention – it truly shows people you’re not only listening, but you’re interested!

    • Melissa

      Yes, and if the kids feel like they are being asked questions from a place of interest instead of discipline or judgment, they are more willing to engage. Thank you for stopping by and sharing your thoughts, Emily! God bless!

  3. “For the hour that a client is in my office, I am theirs. There aren’t any other distractions. I don’t have my phone out. My computer is off. I’m not trying to multitask with household chores. I’m attentive, relaxed, and engaged.” I wonder why it’s so hard for us as parents to create this type of atmosphere for our kids to be able to open up.

    • Melissa

      It’s hard. I think we get too task oriented and our priorities get out of proportion. This is an area I want to be more intentional with my own children as well. Thank you for stopping by and sharing your thoughts. God bless!

  4. This was really helpful! I need to give more undivided attention, I know I need to be present. So often I’m trying to get everything done.

    • Melissa

      That’s a big one for me, too! When I’m home I’m trying to work on the blog and get household stuff done, too. Definitely an area for me to be praying on. Thank you for stopping by and sharing your thoughts. God bless!

  5. Have you heard of Parent Child Interactive Therapy? Some of the suggestions in that really changed how I interact with children. Great advice here. When we actively engage, we grow emotionally healthy kids!

    • Melissa

      Yes, PCIT can be really beneficial. It’s so true that taking an interested and engaged stance can truly help our kids flourish. Thank you for stopping by and commenting. God bless!

  6. OH man, this is good stuff. When I was a youth pastor a lot of parents would complain that their child never talked to them. I would ask them if they initiated the conversations if they would give undivided attention, if they would actually care about what their child is saying etc. Parents really struggle with this, especially during the teen years.

    • Melissa

      Yes, unfortunately as parents we can be quick to correction and criticism. Thank you for stopping by and sharing your experiences. God bless!

    • Melissa

      I’m glad you found the article beneficial. Teens are tough! Thank you for stopping by and sharing your thoughts. God bless!

  7. This is great info! It is so important to give our undivided attention. As a mom, who thrives on multitasking, this is something I am working on.

    • Melissa

      It’s hard to slow down and give undivided attention. But I also know that if I am talking to someone and trying to tell them how I’m feeling, I would like them to be focused on me. Thank you for stopping by and sharing your thoughts. God bless!

  8. My son and I have a great relationship. It has been me and him for some time now but the communication we share is one of the best thing about our mom and son relationship. I am so nosey.lol I ask everyday about his day and if I don’t ask, he asks me. I love this post. Thank you for sharing.

    • Melissa

      That’s awesome that you guys have a close relationship. Thank you for stopping by and sharing your experiences. God bless!

  9. Melissa
    I always wanted to be the milk and cookie mom. To have the kids come home to fresh baked cookies and me with full attention on them. To say I have failed is and understatement. But this week I did it! And boy was it rewarding. When ever do we all sit after school and talk. Priceless! Having not agenda for enjoying my kids is my new mission. Just to sit and listen. Plus in a house of all males they love being listen too!!

    • Melissa

      That’s wonderful that you were able to carve out time to just be with your boys! Thank you for stopping by and sharing your success! God bless!

  10. Insightful and practice, thank you
    As a mom of 6 kids, varying in ages from adult to 11, I am constantly transitioning from conversations with an adult child to a pre-adolescent child throughout the day, so conversation tips such as these are paramount.

    • Melissa

      Thank you Denise. I’m glad you found the post beneficial. The wide age of children could definitely cause conversation whiplash. Thank you for stopping by and sharing your thoughts. God bless!

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